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Why Men Can't Win

- If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.
- If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.
- If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation.
- If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your butt and find something better.
- If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism.
- If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.
- If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment.
- If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.
- If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're insensitive.
- If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist.
- If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.
- If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination.
- If she asks you, it's a favor.
- If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain.
- If you don't, you're a slob.
- If you buy her flowers, you're after something. If you don't, you're not thoughtful.
- If you're proud of your achievements, you're an egotist.
- If you're not, you're not ambitious.
- If she has a headache, she's tired. If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.

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